Ricktional Mortpoon's Rickmas Mortcation Apr 2026

"But Rick! Summer is being held hostage by a species of hyper-capitalist reindeer in the Andromeda galaxy, and Mom is currently arguing with a sentient wreath that wants to harvest her DNA!"

"Rick, I—I think we messed up. This isn't the family vacation you promised." Ricktional Mortpoon's Rickmas Mortcation

Rick wakes up on the couch, surrounded by empty space-nog boxes. His head is pounding with a hangover that could flatten a small moon. Jerry is in the corner, painstakingly untangling a massive ball of holiday lights that Rick clearly cursed to whisper existential dread every time a bulb blinks. Morty enters the room, holding a glowing green box with shaking hands. "But Rick

Morty sighs, following Rick out to the garage as a rogue sleigh-ship streaks across the sky, blasting festive synth-wave music. His head is pounding with a hangover that